We had again more rain. It is tough on shoes. One of my pairs just torn out. Glues disappear with heat and humidity finish leather sandals.
In the bus, when you’re standing, sitting people get your bags in an absolute silence. First, of course, our fears of being stolen make us widen eyes. But bags given back, always in silence, teach you to trust. This strange exchange is made without words but also without look.
Buses accept standing passengers and you could stay like this for a while. You had to quickly grab something quickly to hold firmly (the driver let you few seconds before starting brutally); I almost felt my shoulder going out in a curve recently...!
Students’ joy is a great delight. In the end, can we really be happy alone? Happiness is in sharing.
On the other hand, I’ve been really disappointed by some students behaviour when showing videos about why learning French. I should not but I took it personally. It is not my patriotism which was hurt (maybe...) but it was just a shame to see that some Seychellois denigrate a part of themselves. They are not aware that they are more French than they think. Their History and genes are French.
Readings
I’ve finished Rudyard Kipling’s ‘The Light that Failed’ and it was a good surprise. Even if I’m not really into war descriptions, this novel offered way more than just adventure. I took this book, almost by chance at the Alliance française’s library. I enjoyed reading ‘The Jungle Book’ in its original version (in English) recently. I thought that another Kipling would not be that risky to read. I was not expecting to come across one of the theme that follows me for a moment now and which feeds one of my biggest fear.
I did not believe into destiny when I was younger. I refused the idea that ‘things were written’. But recurrent coincidences happening changed my point of view. Without thinking that your path is already done and that you cannot escape it, I realise that I’ve seen Lars Von Trier’s ‘Dancer in the Dark’ and ‘The Lobster’, in which the theme of blindness is developed. Just like some of my favourite songs, The Smashing Pumpkins’s ‘Porcelina of the Vast Oceans’.
With ‘The Light that Failed’ (a war press correspondent-painter suddenly turning blind), I fear to find clues towards a fate.
I’ve not seen an optometrist for a while and the risk is still there. I fear so much this eternal night. From something like 10 years, this Damocles sword is threatening to fall. My retinas, full of holes and repaired, could give up one day. Panic first shook me. Then I tried to take some distance with it, to see the bright side of the situation. It turns the septic/melancholic girl I was into someone who loves life and who wants to enjoy it. I still want to enjoy it but I know that I could lose and it scares me.
‘Bettý’ was quite surprising and in line with the reputation of Scandinavians and Icelanders.
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